Note to Self: Practice Patience by Noticing Impatience

I was looking through my journal-
 found this short piece from June.
Learning & relearning everyday. 

Practice patience by noticing impatience

11 p.m. trying to fall asleep

I want to... 
teach before I learn.
run before I walk.
leave before I arrive.
love before I listen.

Rarely satisfied. 
Not a bite, I NEED the whole damn cake. 

I've spent the majority of my life wishing for more,
craving it all. 

Expectations keep you from experiencing life fully.
My mind, somewhere far ahead.
My feet, could not catch up. 

Restless and searching.
Engraved in this culture of go-go-go.
An indication of the times.

There needs no shame, no blame, no claim. 

And with that comes change.

Reread, reflect, relearn

The only thing I know is that I know nothing at all.
Though I've had a tendency to come off as
abrasive and pushy with my beliefs,
I toggle somewhere between a cautious child
and a presumptuous idealist. 

I am learning, like the rest of us.

I'm a restless soul,
this is apparent to anyone who knows me well
(or has just bumped into me).
I have a new idea everyday
and I bounce from one rainbow to the next.
For so long I wrote this off as impracticality,
now realizing it's dead-weighted impatience. 

I preach patience as a virtue,
yet have many lessons left to learn.
The more I sit back, the more life unfolds.

We don't have control anyways, 
so I gratefully wave the white flag.

Time will always tell.